Soft Drink Companies Hate Me
May 22, 2006 - Musings
Why do soft drink companies constantly cancel production of my favorite sodas? As far back as my beloved Crystal Pepsi, they've gotten themselves in this habit. Then, when I developed a taste for the vanilla cola that was only ever available in brand-X store brands, they stopped making that, and kept vanilla cola off the market for about five years in preparation for the monumentous release of Vanilla Coke and Pepsi Vanilla. I could've used the vanilla soda during those years, damnit!
And Mello Yello! As often as I drink Mountain Dew, I prefer Mello Yello. But I can't find it anywhere!
The most recently travesty was the doing away of Mountain Dew Pitch Black. They carried it for a while here where I work, but then it abruptly disappeared. That was the only thing I drank! Seriously, someone high up in the soft drink industry must hate me.
Why won't you let us drink in peace!?!
What are you afraid of?!?
Who sent you to attack us!?!
What are you hiding where you have to draw attention to us?!?
What Are You Hiding!?!
WHAT CRIMES HAVE YOU COMMITED!?!
HUH!?!
HUH?!?!!
At least, that's what we Old Farts do.
And, we could go to *any* drugstore with a soda fountain and order a vanilla Coke, cherry phosphate or whatever--for a dime. Of course, we didn't have cell phones and iPods. Guess it all evens out in the end.
:-)